Mahlia Milian, a promising and beautiful young African-American porn starlet, who I had the pleasure of knowing, has recently left the porn industry due to personal issues - namely a pregnancy, which she's had to go through all by herself.
She could really use your help in the form of donations since giving birth to a beautiful baby girl in November.
Click here to read Mahlia Milian (Nyesha's) story and to make a donation to her and her child via ThePinkCross.org
***Side note: It's amazing to me how so many porn industry professionals who know of and/or who have worked with this young woman (and who have probably made quite a bit of money off of her efforts) - and who love to bitch and moan about how the porn industry needs to be "saved", have not come to her aid.
I really hope that Mahlia's past agents have enough of a soul and conscience to donate to help this young woman and her child. Plenty of industry professionals have enough connections and means to hold a fund raiser in support of Mahlia so that she can start a new life, so I hope that someone steps up to the plate and does the right thing.
Saturday, December 26, 2009
Tuesday, December 22, 2009
Stalkers - a reality every adult industry professional should be aware of.
As an adult industry professional (whether you're a pornstar, exotic dancer or webcam girl) you need to be aware that you ARE in the "public eye" and much more visible than than your average everyday person. Essentially you are a sort of "celebrity" and though there are many perks that come with fame and notoriety, there are also a few drawbacks as well - one drawback in particular is that you are often more likely to attract STALKERS.
Adult industry professionals (in my opinion) have a bit more of a difficult time dealing with stalkers than your traditional mainstream celebrity, because stalkers who fixate on pornstars for example, don't just fantasize about their target sexually, they actually have media (videos, online clips, etc) of which they can WATCH their target in what they perceive to be their most intimate moments, which may only fuel the fire they have for the person they're fixated on.
Stalkers who's targets are adult industry professionals often believe they really KNOW YOU because you've turned them on sexually.
Adult Industry professionals tend to be more at risk when it comes to being harassed and possibly attacked by stalkers due to them being more accessible than you're "traditional" celebrity. Adult industry professionals often are not as financially well off as your "A-list" actor or actress, and therefor have less of a "buffer zone" surrounding them.
Also adult industry professionals may not be taken as seriously as their "mainstream" counterparts when reporting a stalker to the authorities due to the negative perception that many people harbor in regards to "sex industry workers".
There's a very thin line which separates a "fan" from a "stalker" and many women (and men) who work in the sex industry aren't immediately aware of the difference, so here are some tips to help you determine who is a healthy fan, versus who is a potentially psychotic obsessed stalker:
As an adult industry professional, especially a pornstar you need to be VERY careful that the person you are dating (or friends with) is not in actuality a stalker. I have known several women in the industry who have found themselves dating someone, only later to find out the person had been their fan for years and owned every single one of their porn videos.
Stalking is illegal and in Los Angeles there are actually anti-stalking laws which are in place and enforced.
Here are some links for more information on identifying stalkers, dealing with stalkers, and keeping yourself safe:
Who are stalkers and HOW to deal with them.
How to Deal With a Stalker
Stalkers - Some Basic Advice (Reasons why, personality types, behaviors & characteristics
Saturday, December 12, 2009
Men who want to get into porn - you have questions, I have answers.
Initially when I started GettingIntoPorn.com , I designed the site as a resource primarily for women interested in entering the adult entertainment industry. However since the site's launch, I've received just as many (if not more) inquiries from men as I have women about the "ins and outs" of the porn world - questions about how to get in, how to make money, how to create a bit of longevity for yourself, etc.
Initially I was hoping to partner up with a male in the industry who'd be as willing as I am to share their knowledge (and their perspective) - well, unfortunately I haven't been able to find one as of yet. The men I've approached in the industry have been a little (forgive my bluntness) bitchy about giving advice to newbie males looking to get started. Maybe due to the current lack of work and not wanting to have competition - who knows.
It's OK however because I've decided to take the initiative and tackle the questions about the male end of the business myself (hell, I do everything myself as it is already anyways, why should this be any different). I've gotten to know the business well enough to at least share the mechanics of how to enter the adult world as a male so I'll share what I've figured out at least up to this point.
This coming year when I launch the webcast for GettingIntoPorn.com I will be including a "male performers corner". Also when I have time I'll ad a "male performers tips" section to the site www.GettingIntoPorn.com
Initially I was hoping to partner up with a male in the industry who'd be as willing as I am to share their knowledge (and their perspective) - well, unfortunately I haven't been able to find one as of yet. The men I've approached in the industry have been a little (forgive my bluntness) bitchy about giving advice to newbie males looking to get started. Maybe due to the current lack of work and not wanting to have competition - who knows.
It's OK however because I've decided to take the initiative and tackle the questions about the male end of the business myself (hell, I do everything myself as it is already anyways, why should this be any different). I've gotten to know the business well enough to at least share the mechanics of how to enter the adult world as a male so I'll share what I've figured out at least up to this point.
This coming year when I launch the webcast for GettingIntoPorn.com I will be including a "male performers corner". Also when I have time I'll ad a "male performers tips" section to the site www.GettingIntoPorn.com
Sunday, December 6, 2009
To run a successful in porn studio , know the business from the ground up.
Today's blog is a bit more directed towards the emails I've received from my readers in regards to requesting advice on how to open a porn studio, distribution company, clips store, etc.
I'll tackle the mechanics of the questions once I launch the show / video blog for gettingintoporn.com (which hopefully I will do before the end of 2009). Today I'll start with one rudementary piece of advice: LEARN THE BUSINESS FROM THE GROUND UP.
I'll refer you to a bit of an emotional and personal take on this piece of advice which I wrote on my personal Monica Foster blog (click here).
I've found that the most successful individuals in porn who direct, run studios and/or produce content were at one time not only adult talent's themselves, but have worked in nearly every capacity of the business. Look at studio owners like Sky Blue, Vince Vouyer & Lexington Steele.
In order to be successful and lead in any industry you opt to enter, you need to have a clear and detailed mental picture of everything and every position which is vital to the finished product. You also need to be willing to take on any task (regardless of how unimportant or low on the totem pole it may seem) within that business. If you don't, then you're sure to overlook important details which are crucial.
So before you decide to sink your own money (or someone else's money) into your dream "porn studio" venture - take the time to see if you can handle working nearly each and every position within the porn industry first.
I'll tackle the mechanics of the questions once I launch the show / video blog for gettingintoporn.com (which hopefully I will do before the end of 2009). Today I'll start with one rudementary piece of advice: LEARN THE BUSINESS FROM THE GROUND UP.
I'll refer you to a bit of an emotional and personal take on this piece of advice which I wrote on my personal Monica Foster blog (click here).
I've found that the most successful individuals in porn who direct, run studios and/or produce content were at one time not only adult talent's themselves, but have worked in nearly every capacity of the business. Look at studio owners like Sky Blue, Vince Vouyer & Lexington Steele.
In order to be successful and lead in any industry you opt to enter, you need to have a clear and detailed mental picture of everything and every position which is vital to the finished product. You also need to be willing to take on any task (regardless of how unimportant or low on the totem pole it may seem) within that business. If you don't, then you're sure to overlook important details which are crucial.
So before you decide to sink your own money (or someone else's money) into your dream "porn studio" venture - take the time to see if you can handle working nearly each and every position within the porn industry first.
Tuesday, November 24, 2009
Store Signings
Once you've worked in the world of porn for a bit, typically it's a good idea (that is if you plan on your career having any degree of longevity) to get out to industry events and fan "meet and greets" - such as store signings.
I just attended my first store signing as an adult industry talent November 21st and it was definitely worth taking time out of my schedule to meet the people who keep the adult industry going - the fans :)
Check out the video below:
I just attended my first store signing as an adult industry talent November 21st and it was definitely worth taking time out of my schedule to meet the people who keep the adult industry going - the fans :)
Check out the video below:
Friday, November 20, 2009
Oprah's Porn & Women special
On November 17th, 2009 (this past Tuesday), Oprah Winfrey's talk show did a feature on the porn industry entitled "Porn and Women". Though I was impressed initially that Oprah was brave enough to bring such a "controversial" topic to a daytime and mainstream audience, I was disappointed in her guest selections and Oprah's own overall tone (I felt she was a bit condescending and judgemental - not just verbally but it was evident in her body language).
I hope Oprah decides to do a follow up to this show. I feel she (or Lisa Ling) really need to research the topic a bit more and interview a better selection of adult industry professionals - Nicki Hunter for example would be a much better guest selection - she's incredibly well rounded in her choice of profession and in life (she's a pornstar, owns and runs a successful family of websites, has a show on Playboy radio, is a makeup artist, is married & is a mother).
A good online friend of mine who is also an adult industry professional (yes, there really may be an army of hot, ebony, intelligent, sexy, cam girls out there) created a great video response to the show, check it out below.
I hope Oprah decides to do a follow up to this show. I feel she (or Lisa Ling) really need to research the topic a bit more and interview a better selection of adult industry professionals - Nicki Hunter for example would be a much better guest selection - she's incredibly well rounded in her choice of profession and in life (she's a pornstar, owns and runs a successful family of websites, has a show on Playboy radio, is a makeup artist, is married & is a mother).
A good online friend of mine who is also an adult industry professional (yes, there really may be an army of hot, ebony, intelligent, sexy, cam girls out there) created a great video response to the show, check it out below.
Wednesday, November 11, 2009
Come out to Les Deux tonight and support AIM and L.A.T.A.T.A
For those of you as lucky as I am to live in Los Angeles, Club Les Deux will be THE place to be tonight if you want to hang with myself, or your other favorite hot adult actors and actresses. The event starts @ 9pm.
Les Deux will be ground zero for the LATATA.org "This is our industry" fund raising event. Currently AIM is under fire and they need your help. Visit the LATATA.org website for more info.
Les Deux will be ground zero for the LATATA.org "This is our industry" fund raising event. Currently AIM is under fire and they need your help. Visit the LATATA.org website for more info.
Saturday, November 7, 2009
Fine Tuning and Improving your Performances
The more email feedback I receive in regards to this blog and the gettingintoporn.com website, the more I've come to realize that many adult industry outsiders and insiders alike, initially are under the impression that a "hot body and pretty face" is all that is needed to become successful in the world of adult entertainment.
I'll admit, that initially I thought the same, but after only a few days of exotic dancing back in 2002, I found out very quickly, that it's your mind above all else, that is a performer's greatest (and ironically most attractive) asset.
Whether you're an exotic dancer, webcam girl, or adult actress - fine tuning and consistently IMPROVING your performance and/or style is a must. Generally the only way to do this, is by asking your clients/audience/who you work with what they think could be better (of course be careful who you take advice from) AND by watching your performances yourself.
If you're an exotic dancer, have someone video tape you while you're dancing in the club or just set up a video camera at home and tape yourself. Critically watch how you move and see if there's anything that you could add or subtract from your style.
If you're an adult actress, watch your movies and scenes. YES, I know watching yourself can be VERY hard to do. Most people who work in performance based industries tend to be a bit insecure and are overly self critical by nature (I know I am), but if you can get over your initial fears of self doubt and watch yourself as if you're watching someone else (really analyzing elements that can be improved on) you'll find that you will become much more natural, relaxed, and self aware in front of the camera.
Exotic dancers, adult actresses, and virtually anyone else in adult entertainment, should also keep up with and be aware of the performance styles of their peers. Not to "copycat" but to simply learn what works (and doesn't work) for who.
Generally the most successful entertainers are those who have seriously fine tuned, their craft and KNOW their craft most thoroughly. It takes a mind to achieve that, not just a hot body or pretty face :)
I'll admit, that initially I thought the same, but after only a few days of exotic dancing back in 2002, I found out very quickly, that it's your mind above all else, that is a performer's greatest (and ironically most attractive) asset.
Whether you're an exotic dancer, webcam girl, or adult actress - fine tuning and consistently IMPROVING your performance and/or style is a must. Generally the only way to do this, is by asking your clients/audience/who you work with what they think could be better (of course be careful who you take advice from) AND by watching your performances yourself.
If you're an exotic dancer, have someone video tape you while you're dancing in the club or just set up a video camera at home and tape yourself. Critically watch how you move and see if there's anything that you could add or subtract from your style.
If you're an adult actress, watch your movies and scenes. YES, I know watching yourself can be VERY hard to do. Most people who work in performance based industries tend to be a bit insecure and are overly self critical by nature (I know I am), but if you can get over your initial fears of self doubt and watch yourself as if you're watching someone else (really analyzing elements that can be improved on) you'll find that you will become much more natural, relaxed, and self aware in front of the camera.
Exotic dancers, adult actresses, and virtually anyone else in adult entertainment, should also keep up with and be aware of the performance styles of their peers. Not to "copycat" but to simply learn what works (and doesn't work) for who.
Generally the most successful entertainers are those who have seriously fine tuned, their craft and KNOW their craft most thoroughly. It takes a mind to achieve that, not just a hot body or pretty face :)
Saturday, October 17, 2009
Not ready for porn? Considering stripping? Here's a tip...
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Thursday, September 24, 2009
Taking time off after you begin performing.
When I first began performing in porn, initially I had the idea that I'd work consistently for around 4 to years. Well, considering that I got into the porn business during a transitional stage in our economy (and especially in the adult industry) AND the fact that after beginning to perform, I realized that "porn world" was far different than I'd anticipated, I decided to take some time off from around Feb of 2009 to August 2009.
I needed the time off to rethink and reassess:
When you enter the world of porn, truthfully - it can be a bit of a shock. Most people don't realize this, but porn world is essential a culture and lifestyle. It can take a while to become familiar and comfortable with ( and some people never DO become familiar and/or comfortable with it - if you're one of those people, it's not a business for you).
I've found that I like porn world - a lot. My long term goal is to write, direct, and produce adult features - period. It took me a while to realize that I'm as much of a "weirdo and pervert" as I am, but truthfully, if I hadn't taken time off to really get to know my "post porn" self I would not have ever realized this.
Come October, I will be entering "phase 2" of "Monica Foster - the porn girl". I took the time to revamp my website, and look during my time off. I also took the time to get my mind where it needs to be in order to be the type of performer I want to be.
My suggestion to those in, or thinking about getting into the porn world, is to allow your initial entrance to simply be "phase 1" . You most likely will not be the performer or person you were when you began after even just a year, so pace yourself. Shoot some scenes, take in your surroundings, but then retract and figure out if this is something you want to build a career out of, because performing in porn generally isn't just something you can do and then walk away from without it substantially effecting MANY areas of your life from that point on.
I needed the time off to rethink and reassess:
- What type of performer I really am.
- Whether the porn business is really right for me.
- How I could build a career on the foundation (my websites and past porn movies I've been featured in) that I'd created for myself already.
When you enter the world of porn, truthfully - it can be a bit of a shock. Most people don't realize this, but porn world is essential a culture and lifestyle. It can take a while to become familiar and comfortable with ( and some people never DO become familiar and/or comfortable with it - if you're one of those people, it's not a business for you).
I've found that I like porn world - a lot. My long term goal is to write, direct, and produce adult features - period. It took me a while to realize that I'm as much of a "weirdo and pervert" as I am, but truthfully, if I hadn't taken time off to really get to know my "post porn" self I would not have ever realized this.
Come October, I will be entering "phase 2" of "Monica Foster - the porn girl". I took the time to revamp my website, and look during my time off. I also took the time to get my mind where it needs to be in order to be the type of performer I want to be.
My suggestion to those in, or thinking about getting into the porn world, is to allow your initial entrance to simply be "phase 1" . You most likely will not be the performer or person you were when you began after even just a year, so pace yourself. Shoot some scenes, take in your surroundings, but then retract and figure out if this is something you want to build a career out of, because performing in porn generally isn't just something you can do and then walk away from without it substantially effecting MANY areas of your life from that point on.
Monica 2008 | Monica Foster 2009 |
Wednesday, September 16, 2009
Verify the STD test of who you work with BEFORE shooting a scene
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Sunday, September 13, 2009
The importance of owning your domain name and website.
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Sunday, September 6, 2009
Tanner Mayes "Meltdown" followup interview
A month or so ago there was a video circulated online by JM productions of young pornstar Tanner Mayes supposedly drugged up and/or liquored up and flipping out on a behind the scenes on a porn set.
Initially when I posted about the video , I was a bit harsh in my thoughts on Tanner's behavior.
When I saw this video I felt she was acting very unprofessional, however I also knew there must be more to her level of hostility, than just a cellphone being lost.
Julie Meadows recently conducted an excellent interview with Tanner to get the real story as to why she blew up on set and how she was taken advantage of by the people she was working with for over a year.
This interview clearly shows how there is much more to the porn industry, than just sex on camera, for many of the performers.
It will be interesting to watch how Tanner's situation progresses.
Initially when I posted about the video , I was a bit harsh in my thoughts on Tanner's behavior.
When I saw this video I felt she was acting very unprofessional, however I also knew there must be more to her level of hostility, than just a cellphone being lost.
Julie Meadows recently conducted an excellent interview with Tanner to get the real story as to why she blew up on set and how she was taken advantage of by the people she was working with for over a year.
This interview clearly shows how there is much more to the porn industry, than just sex on camera, for many of the performers.
It will be interesting to watch how Tanner's situation progresses.
Tuesday, September 1, 2009
Taking a role in porn is no different than taking a role in mainstream entertainment.
As a porn performer you most likely will be cast into a wide variety of roles in a wide variety of niches your look may fall into. Whether it be a horny school girl, a dominant MILF, a sexy nurse, etc - please think carefully and consider whether the role, part and dialog the writer, director or studio requests that you act out is something that you can live with later.
Just as you should carefully consider whether or not doing porn itself is something that's right for you both now, and later on in life (remember - it's not something that you can EVER take back), you should put the same thought and consideration into each and every part you play (in each and every movie and/or scene that you're cast in).
Depending on your current life and financial situation, it can be easy to jump at ANY part you are offered (and often those around you, both personally and professionally may strongly encourage you to do so), however this is YOUR LIFE and YOUR CAREER - not anyone else's.
Deciding whether a part is right for you can be difficult - especially when it comes to the time frame in which you're often forced to decide (as a new performer, most of the time you won't even find out what a scene is about until you arrive on set if the scene or movie is booked by an agency - often times you won't even see a script until you arrive on set). My suggestion is to simply go with your gut and your instincts. Don't be afraid to speak up if the dialog isn't something that you feel goes against how you feel about certain things.
For example - if you have a problem with (as most people do) the subject matter of incest, and you have a look which falls into the "teen" niche of porn, make it known to your agent. If you arrive on set and are cast opposite of an older man and are directed to play the role of his daughter who later in the scene you're directed to perform sexually with - you have the right to say "hey, I'm not comfortable with this". Yes the scene may be canceled, but it may also simply be altered. Regardless why play a role that isn't something that you can live with later on?
Here's another example - lets say that you fall into the MILF category and you are cast in an interracial scene of which the person you are cast opposite of for the sex scene is a young black man. Lets say that setup of the scene is that you're a lonely housewife who decides to get it on with your mechanic, BUT the catch is that the studio director wants you to call the black male performer a "N*gger" in the dialog. If racial name calling is something that you have a problem with in your real life, then you may not want to do it on camera.
As a final example - lets say that you are cast as the lead in an adult movie of which you are asked to play a political figure, or any real life person in a "parody". Yes, such a role can definitely assist in sky-rocketing your adult industry career, however remember that such a role can be damaging to whoever you're impersonating's career. In this situation I suppose I have to say that if you wouldn't want someone to impersonate you, you might not want to impersonate them.
I as an adult industry haven't always thought things through when it's come to accepting roles in porn movies. Rather than going into detail, I'll simply link to a couple of my recent "Monica Foster" blogs.
http://monicafoster.blogspot.com/2009/09/another-blog-100-from-woman-who-created.html
http://monicafoster.blogspot.com/2009/08/problem-with-porn-parodies.html
In conclusion, just as top professional mainstream actors and actresses carefully consider roles before taking them, you, even as a beginner in the porn world, should do so as well.
Just as you should carefully consider whether or not doing porn itself is something that's right for you both now, and later on in life (remember - it's not something that you can EVER take back), you should put the same thought and consideration into each and every part you play (in each and every movie and/or scene that you're cast in).
Depending on your current life and financial situation, it can be easy to jump at ANY part you are offered (and often those around you, both personally and professionally may strongly encourage you to do so), however this is YOUR LIFE and YOUR CAREER - not anyone else's.
Deciding whether a part is right for you can be difficult - especially when it comes to the time frame in which you're often forced to decide (as a new performer, most of the time you won't even find out what a scene is about until you arrive on set if the scene or movie is booked by an agency - often times you won't even see a script until you arrive on set). My suggestion is to simply go with your gut and your instincts. Don't be afraid to speak up if the dialog isn't something that you feel goes against how you feel about certain things.
For example - if you have a problem with (as most people do) the subject matter of incest, and you have a look which falls into the "teen" niche of porn, make it known to your agent. If you arrive on set and are cast opposite of an older man and are directed to play the role of his daughter who later in the scene you're directed to perform sexually with - you have the right to say "hey, I'm not comfortable with this". Yes the scene may be canceled, but it may also simply be altered. Regardless why play a role that isn't something that you can live with later on?
Here's another example - lets say that you fall into the MILF category and you are cast in an interracial scene of which the person you are cast opposite of for the sex scene is a young black man. Lets say that setup of the scene is that you're a lonely housewife who decides to get it on with your mechanic, BUT the catch is that the studio director wants you to call the black male performer a "N*gger" in the dialog. If racial name calling is something that you have a problem with in your real life, then you may not want to do it on camera.
As a final example - lets say that you are cast as the lead in an adult movie of which you are asked to play a political figure, or any real life person in a "parody". Yes, such a role can definitely assist in sky-rocketing your adult industry career, however remember that such a role can be damaging to whoever you're impersonating's career. In this situation I suppose I have to say that if you wouldn't want someone to impersonate you, you might not want to impersonate them.
I as an adult industry haven't always thought things through when it's come to accepting roles in porn movies. Rather than going into detail, I'll simply link to a couple of my recent "Monica Foster" blogs.
http://monicafoster.blogspot.com/2009/09/another-blog-100-from-woman-who-created.html
http://monicafoster.blogspot.com/2009/08/problem-with-porn-parodies.html
In conclusion, just as top professional mainstream actors and actresses carefully consider roles before taking them, you, even as a beginner in the porn world, should do so as well.
Monday, August 3, 2009
"Private" shoots
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Sunday, July 26, 2009
An example for young women getting into porn of how NOT to act
I strongly encourage women in, or thinking of entering the porn industry to watch the following video:
http://www.myvideo.de/watch/6728364/Tanner_Mayes#
It may seem like a dramatization, but I'm fairly certain it's not - the video is not continuous, so parts may have been edited out that MIGHT have justified her behavior and language, but regardless, this is an example of how NOT to behave on set.
Ironically this young woman began with the same talent agency as myself, in the video was shooting in the same studio of which "Not the Cosby's XXX" was filmed in (the "Cosby couch" can actually be seen in this video) , and was working with a producer that I've worked with in the past (who I actually had no problem working with - thought he was down to earth when I worked with him on SILFs).
I'm not sure what exactly happened to this young woman on this day - however regardless of the circumstance -she was out of control when this video footage was taken and that's not good. From what I can observe she has a lot of built up anger and frustration, and probably needs to take a break from the industry for a bit to "reset".
I decided to touch on this video in this blog because I've been there - Not within the porn business, but definitely back when I was an exotic dancer. One thing I learned in time, was that when things got to where I thought I'd go insane, it was best that I walked away. I encourage others to do the same.
If you reach a point in the adult industry (whether you're a dancer, webcam girl, or doing porn) to where you are as angry as Tanner appears to be in this video, the adult industry may not be right for you, at that point in your life. Your happiness and sanity is always more valuable than any amount of money a studio may pay you for a scene.
In the adult video business, as I talk about on www.gettingintoporn.com - you need to maintain a clear head, present yourself in a professional manner and at least attempt to remain "sane" - otherwise people WILL exploit you, which is what has happened in this particular instance.
What's really bad about this particular situation is that there WILL be people that this young woman comes across who will "OK" and even encourage her to continue to act immaturely. She may see people who do so as being "on her side" at this phase in her life, but in reality these are people who's goal is to bring her down, control, manipulate and eventually destroy her.
Just remember ladies:
1) No one likes a diva, regardless of how much money you make, how popular you are or how pretty you are. That doesn't mean you shouldn't have high self esteem, it just means that you don't need to be a narcissist - at least not on set.
2) You won't be young and cute forever - conduct yourself as an ADULT because you are working in the ADULT BUSINESS.
3) No one can "make you" get into porn, or quit porn (and truthfully, no one cares because there are many who can replace you that arrive in Los Angeles daily) - and by acting (and speaking) as if someone can, dis empowers you substantially.
I wish Tanner the best.
http://www.myvideo.de/watch/6728364/Tanner_Mayes#
It may seem like a dramatization, but I'm fairly certain it's not - the video is not continuous, so parts may have been edited out that MIGHT have justified her behavior and language, but regardless, this is an example of how NOT to behave on set.
Ironically this young woman began with the same talent agency as myself, in the video was shooting in the same studio of which "Not the Cosby's XXX" was filmed in (the "Cosby couch" can actually be seen in this video) , and was working with a producer that I've worked with in the past (who I actually had no problem working with - thought he was down to earth when I worked with him on SILFs).
I'm not sure what exactly happened to this young woman on this day - however regardless of the circumstance -she was out of control when this video footage was taken and that's not good. From what I can observe she has a lot of built up anger and frustration, and probably needs to take a break from the industry for a bit to "reset".
I decided to touch on this video in this blog because I've been there - Not within the porn business, but definitely back when I was an exotic dancer. One thing I learned in time, was that when things got to where I thought I'd go insane, it was best that I walked away. I encourage others to do the same.
If you reach a point in the adult industry (whether you're a dancer, webcam girl, or doing porn) to where you are as angry as Tanner appears to be in this video, the adult industry may not be right for you, at that point in your life. Your happiness and sanity is always more valuable than any amount of money a studio may pay you for a scene.
In the adult video business, as I talk about on www.gettingintoporn.com - you need to maintain a clear head, present yourself in a professional manner and at least attempt to remain "sane" - otherwise people WILL exploit you, which is what has happened in this particular instance.
What's really bad about this particular situation is that there WILL be people that this young woman comes across who will "OK" and even encourage her to continue to act immaturely. She may see people who do so as being "on her side" at this phase in her life, but in reality these are people who's goal is to bring her down, control, manipulate and eventually destroy her.
Just remember ladies:
1) No one likes a diva, regardless of how much money you make, how popular you are or how pretty you are. That doesn't mean you shouldn't have high self esteem, it just means that you don't need to be a narcissist - at least not on set.
2) You won't be young and cute forever - conduct yourself as an ADULT because you are working in the ADULT BUSINESS.
3) No one can "make you" get into porn, or quit porn (and truthfully, no one cares because there are many who can replace you that arrive in Los Angeles daily) - and by acting (and speaking) as if someone can, dis empowers you substantially.
I wish Tanner the best.
Saturday, July 25, 2009
gettingintoporn.com webcast
Next week, probably Wednesday I will start the GettingIntoPorn.com webcast. It will probably just be a video blog, but in time I will make it a live "chat in" and "call in" show. The first installment will just be me answering some of the email questions which have been sent in.
Friday, July 17, 2009
Industry alert, condom use in porn & CNBC porn documentary link
If you're reading this blog, you're most likely an industry professional already or thinking about entering the porn business. Regardless I feel that it's my responsibility to relate current happenings in the industry that I'm aware of.
I strongly suggest to all women (and men) if you have a scene booked in the near future you should read the following postings:
SETH DICKENS- Finally Speaks on his Involvement in the HIV+ Mess
Seth Dickens Writes about his Life in porn and out…
This man is NOT the only person who had contact with Patient X. He is the only one who's had the GUTS to come out (I actually admire him for doing so but I also think he should re-think his current mindset and activities). In my opinion, Seth at this junction in his career has the opportunity to set a good example and be a LEADER rather than a victim. There are other performers who have been in AIM's HIV quarantine as well who HAVE NOT COME OUT.
I personally do not feel the quarantine period (which is under 30 days) is long enough for someone who's been directly exposed to HIV. Especially considering what we know as common fact in the scientific world in regards to the incubation period of the HIV virus.
If this was not an issue to be concerned about, then WHY would the AIDS Healthcare foundation be filing a LAWSUIT against LA County to require condom use in porn? Think about it people - please use your brains, before using your genitalia.
I'd like to refer people to watch the following CNBC documentary: http://www.mefeedia.com/entry/porn-business-of-pleasure/20754421
I will post my analysis of this overly glammed and glossed over piece on a later date. All I have to ask CNBC for now though, is why don't you show the REAL trenches of the porn industry?
I strongly suggest to all women (and men) if you have a scene booked in the near future you should read the following postings:
SETH DICKENS- Finally Speaks on his Involvement in the HIV+ Mess
Seth Dickens Writes about his Life in porn and out…
This man is NOT the only person who had contact with Patient X. He is the only one who's had the GUTS to come out (I actually admire him for doing so but I also think he should re-think his current mindset and activities). In my opinion, Seth at this junction in his career has the opportunity to set a good example and be a LEADER rather than a victim. There are other performers who have been in AIM's HIV quarantine as well who HAVE NOT COME OUT.
I personally do not feel the quarantine period (which is under 30 days) is long enough for someone who's been directly exposed to HIV. Especially considering what we know as common fact in the scientific world in regards to the incubation period of the HIV virus.
If this was not an issue to be concerned about, then WHY would the AIDS Healthcare foundation be filing a LAWSUIT against LA County to require condom use in porn? Think about it people - please use your brains, before using your genitalia.
I'd like to refer people to watch the following CNBC documentary: http://www.mefeedia.com/entry/porn-business-of-pleasure/20754421
I will post my analysis of this overly glammed and glossed over piece on a later date. All I have to ask CNBC for now though, is why don't you show the REAL trenches of the porn industry?
Wednesday, July 15, 2009
Birth Control
I just realized this morning that under the "Health Issues and STDs" section of the site, I neglected a very important topic: Birth Control.
To most I suppose this would be a "given" to take care of prior to getting into the "sex biz", but being that though some have this covered, others do not.
If you're a young woman (or even a "cougar") getting into the porn industry PLEASE visit your gynocologist (or if you don't have a regular doctor, your local family planning center) and get a subscription for birth control of some sort. If for whatever reason you can't do that, there are places you can order birth control online - but I don't recommend it being that it's always a good idea to be under a doctors supervision with ANY sort of medication you take.
Since I've been in the porn industry, though it's not often discussed, I have come across women who have "become with child" via their male talent during a scene they were shooting. This of course is a horrible situation and different women have made different decisions in regards of what to do.
Just keep in mind - terminating a pregnancy is NOT fun - and not "as easy as 1 2 3". Not only is their physical risks and pain associated with abortion (medical or surgical method) but there is a tremendous amount of emotional pain as well.
Always safe guard yourself and keep a clear head if porn is something you've decided you want to do.
To most I suppose this would be a "given" to take care of prior to getting into the "sex biz", but being that though some have this covered, others do not.
If you're a young woman (or even a "cougar") getting into the porn industry PLEASE visit your gynocologist (or if you don't have a regular doctor, your local family planning center) and get a subscription for birth control of some sort. If for whatever reason you can't do that, there are places you can order birth control online - but I don't recommend it being that it's always a good idea to be under a doctors supervision with ANY sort of medication you take.
Since I've been in the porn industry, though it's not often discussed, I have come across women who have "become with child" via their male talent during a scene they were shooting. This of course is a horrible situation and different women have made different decisions in regards of what to do.
Just keep in mind - terminating a pregnancy is NOT fun - and not "as easy as 1 2 3". Not only is their physical risks and pain associated with abortion (medical or surgical method) but there is a tremendous amount of emotional pain as well.
Always safe guard yourself and keep a clear head if porn is something you've decided you want to do.
Wednesday, July 8, 2009
Build your own website or HIRE A COMPANY to do it for you.
I felt the need to write about BEING IN CONTROL of your own "OFFICIAL WEBSITE" today due to a VERY DISTURBING trend I've noticed in the emails I've received since launching www.gettingintoporn.com
A little over a quarter of the emails I'm receiving are from MEN (I'm not a man hater, however GettingIntoPorn.com specifically says that it's primarily a free resource for WOMEN - as I don't really know much about the male side of performing) and many of these men either already fall into the "Pimp" or "Wannabe Pimp" category of which I outline under the "Porn Industry Problems and Dangers" section of www.GettingIntoPorn.com
Here's an excerpt from a recent email:
I'm kinda getting started in a weird adult career - advising entertainers on how to maximize their income - not through management, but simply coaching. It's nice to see a site like this as a resource not only for girls getting their start, but also as a way for more established girls "with blinders on" to see some additional options/choices they can make to keep a career going longer, transition to other things, and just generally be more aware of what goes on.
And of course, for me, I love it, since it confirms a lot of what I've been advising my clients, and also helps me understand things better as a relative "outsider" - I initially worked only with strippers, so I feel like I'm coming a bit late to the game on the adult acting side of the house.
Anyway, keep up the good work, I notice the site is getting a lot of press. And, if you need any help getting the content into a better CMS/organization/design, I'd do the work free.
The man who wrote the above email is a very dangerous person and is obviously a very cocky person who believes that all women , even I, will fall for his "hey I just wanna help you out - oh and for free" line. This man actually believed that I would accept his "help" and just HAND OVER my hosting user name and password and other info for him to redesign and TAKE OVER my website. I DON'T THINK SO.
To all the women out there - NO ONE IS REALLY WILLING TO HELP YOU FOR FREE. THEY (or anyone else) WILL EITHER ALWAYS WANT SOMETHING IN RETURN OR THE ONLY REASON THEY ARE "HELPING" YOU IS TO HAVE CONTROL OVER YOU.
DON'T BE A VICTIM LADIES!!!!!!!
I don't think people have ANY IDEA as to how many women in the porn industry have had people "volunteer" to build their official websites "free of charge", and then DISAPPEAR. I just had drinks yesterday with a fellow "pornstar" that this has happened to. Oh, and to make it worse she's never seen a DIME from her website which is STILL ONLINE and attracting memberships for SOMEONES NETWORK!
Many men TARGET attractive women (from exotic dancers to porn stars) and pretend to be their friend to develop their website, but then they CLAIM that the site isn't making money (cause they are keeping all the money for themselves and not reporting the actual earnings to the girl) OR they hold the site "hostage" to keep the girl around and/or force the girl to pay the guy more money than the site is worth to attain ownership of the domain/site content. Some guys go as far as to skip town with the website info and content. It's getting BAD out there.
Lets face some facts here, unfortunately most women who get into the adult entertainment world are not computer savvy - not because these women are not smart, but simply because they most likely haven't been heavily exposed to the world of technology.
If you are one of these women, I STRONGLY SUGGEST you buy a $400 to $600 dollar laptop that has software installed on it such as Adobe Photoshop and Publisher (or save some money and order one online via www.TigerDirect.com or a website of the like ) and then buy a book like "HTML for DUMMIES". YES IT IS HARD WORK BUT YOU CAN DO IT.
And if you find yourself overly frustrated and not able to do it - HIRE A LEGITIMATE COMPANY that you have researched (and actually has a decent portfolio) to build your website. That way you OWN YOUR SITE and are making money from it rather than some wanna be loser pimp.
When you start an "official website" for yourself the domain name needs to registered in YOUR NAME and so does the hosting. You need to make sure you have the username and password to your payment processing interface AND your hosting account (server space). You need to retain physical posession AND ownership of ALL YOUR CONTENT.
Anyone or any company that does not give you control of the vital keys (that I just outlined above) to your Official Website is AN ASSHOLE & wannabe pimp/scammer and NOT TO BE TRUSTED.
My new website/business www.XXXsimplesites.com will be launched soon of which I will be assisting women start their own official websites for a very reasonable price of which THE PERFORMER IS IN CONTROL OF EVERYTHING , so stay tuned for that, but in the mean time - BE CAREFUL!
A little over a quarter of the emails I'm receiving are from MEN (I'm not a man hater, however GettingIntoPorn.com specifically says that it's primarily a free resource for WOMEN - as I don't really know much about the male side of performing) and many of these men either already fall into the "Pimp" or "Wannabe Pimp" category of which I outline under the "Porn Industry Problems and Dangers" section of www.GettingIntoPorn.com
Here's an excerpt from a recent email:
I'm kinda getting started in a weird adult career - advising entertainers on how to maximize their income - not through management, but simply coaching. It's nice to see a site like this as a resource not only for girls getting their start, but also as a way for more established girls "with blinders on" to see some additional options/choices they can make to keep a career going longer, transition to other things, and just generally be more aware of what goes on.
And of course, for me, I love it, since it confirms a lot of what I've been advising my clients, and also helps me understand things better as a relative "outsider" - I initially worked only with strippers, so I feel like I'm coming a bit late to the game on the adult acting side of the house.
Anyway, keep up the good work, I notice the site is getting a lot of press. And, if you need any help getting the content into a better CMS/organization/design, I'd do the work free.
The man who wrote the above email is a very dangerous person and is obviously a very cocky person who believes that all women , even I, will fall for his "hey I just wanna help you out - oh and for free" line. This man actually believed that I would accept his "help" and just HAND OVER my hosting user name and password and other info for him to redesign and TAKE OVER my website. I DON'T THINK SO.
To all the women out there - NO ONE IS REALLY WILLING TO HELP YOU FOR FREE. THEY (or anyone else) WILL EITHER ALWAYS WANT SOMETHING IN RETURN OR THE ONLY REASON THEY ARE "HELPING" YOU IS TO HAVE CONTROL OVER YOU.
DON'T BE A VICTIM LADIES!!!!!!!
I don't think people have ANY IDEA as to how many women in the porn industry have had people "volunteer" to build their official websites "free of charge", and then DISAPPEAR. I just had drinks yesterday with a fellow "pornstar" that this has happened to. Oh, and to make it worse she's never seen a DIME from her website which is STILL ONLINE and attracting memberships for SOMEONES NETWORK!
Many men TARGET attractive women (from exotic dancers to porn stars) and pretend to be their friend to develop their website, but then they CLAIM that the site isn't making money (cause they are keeping all the money for themselves and not reporting the actual earnings to the girl) OR they hold the site "hostage" to keep the girl around and/or force the girl to pay the guy more money than the site is worth to attain ownership of the domain/site content. Some guys go as far as to skip town with the website info and content. It's getting BAD out there.
Lets face some facts here, unfortunately most women who get into the adult entertainment world are not computer savvy - not because these women are not smart, but simply because they most likely haven't been heavily exposed to the world of technology.
If you are one of these women, I STRONGLY SUGGEST you buy a $400 to $600 dollar laptop that has software installed on it such as Adobe Photoshop and Publisher (or save some money and order one online via www.TigerDirect.com or a website of the like ) and then buy a book like "HTML for DUMMIES". YES IT IS HARD WORK BUT YOU CAN DO IT.
And if you find yourself overly frustrated and not able to do it - HIRE A LEGITIMATE COMPANY that you have researched (and actually has a decent portfolio) to build your website. That way you OWN YOUR SITE and are making money from it rather than some wanna be loser pimp.
When you start an "official website" for yourself the domain name needs to registered in YOUR NAME and so does the hosting. You need to make sure you have the username and password to your payment processing interface AND your hosting account (server space). You need to retain physical posession AND ownership of ALL YOUR CONTENT.
Anyone or any company that does not give you control of the vital keys (that I just outlined above) to your Official Website is AN ASSHOLE & wannabe pimp/scammer and NOT TO BE TRUSTED.
My new website/business www.XXXsimplesites.com will be launched soon of which I will be assisting women start their own official websites for a very reasonable price of which THE PERFORMER IS IN CONTROL OF EVERYTHING , so stay tuned for that, but in the mean time - BE CAREFUL!
Tuesday, July 7, 2009
gettingintoporn.com might have become too popular
This morning upon waking up I found that my primary hosting server had nearly crashed - in a way it's a good thing because that means that www.GettingIntoPorn.com has become MUCH more popular than I'd ever anticipated (quite a few THOUSAND hits last night). However this also means that I have to upgrade my hosting plan which translates into "spending more money than I have" - oh well, that's life I suppose.
I will probably have to sell advertising space on the website or something (I'll sell it cheap though) to cover the cost of the hosting plan - but I don't think that will be difficult, which brings me to my next point.
Since launching GettingIntoPorn.com I have had SOOOOO many excellent startup companies contact me with excellent solutions that ANY independent porn performer or cam girl with a website could implement to maximize their earnings. I will have to make a whole seperate area on the website just for that.
I will probably have to sell advertising space on the website or something (I'll sell it cheap though) to cover the cost of the hosting plan - but I don't think that will be difficult, which brings me to my next point.
Since launching GettingIntoPorn.com I have had SOOOOO many excellent startup companies contact me with excellent solutions that ANY independent porn performer or cam girl with a website could implement to maximize their earnings. I will have to make a whole seperate area on the website just for that.
Monday, July 6, 2009
GettingIntoPorn.com is making news.
This summary is not available. Please
click here to view the post.
Sunday, July 5, 2009
www.GettingIntoPorn.com is officially launched
This summary is not available. Please
click here to view the post.
Wednesday, July 1, 2009
Site launch postponed to the 4th of July
This summary is not available. Please
click here to view the post.
Friday, June 26, 2009
GettingIntoPorn.com is almost complete
This summary is not available. Please
click here to view the post.
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